Thoughts on Parashat Yitro 5786
Rabbi Menachem Mirski
Imagine you are an extremely devoted, ambitious person, the ultimate over-performer—the person who says yes to everything because “if you don’t do it, who will?”. So, you are a volunteer in a synagogue and you are packing mishloach manot at 10 p.m. You plan to deliver all of them tomorrow. Oh, I forgot to tell you that the synagogue you’re volunteering at is The Central Synagogue in New York. So… you need to deliver mishloach manot to roughly 3000 households… It’s early March… and it’s snowing. How does it sound? Ridiculous?
Yes, it sounds silly but it’s close to what Moshe is doing in our parasha this week. Exodus, chapter 18 tells us the story: Moshe sits from morning until evening judging every dispute. People line up like at the DMV, on Monday, during lunch break, right before Thanksgiving, standing, waiting, grumbling. Then Yitro, his father-in-law, shows up, sees the entire scene and says: “Moshe, my boychick, this is not good!” (v. 17).
“You will surely wear yourself out, and these people as well. The task is too heavy for you; you cannot do it alone.” (Exodus 18:18)
Notice that Yitro doesn’t just say Moshe will burn out. He says both—Moshe and the people—will wear out. That’s the thing sometimes we forget: micromanaging, controlling everything or simple lack of delegation skills doesn’t just exhaust the leader; it exhausts everyone.
Think about it: When one person insists on shouldering every burden—making every decision, fixing every flaw—what happens to the community around them? Progress slows as people wait for approval. Energy drains. Frustration grows, and initiative dies. Why risk stepping forward if your efforts will only be second-guessed or completely undone?
And here’s the irony—It doesn’t have to be one person. A group of micromanagers in a company, organization, or even a nation produces the same results, just on a larger scale: first the system crawls, until it ultimately collapses.
True strength comes from shared responsibility, not centralized control. And we Jews know this!
So Moshe, being thoughtful and humble, follows the instructions of his father in law. These instructions – the wisdom of this Midianite priest – made into the Torah, the Holy Book of the Jewish people – people of another religion! That’s impressive! Wouldn’t you like to change something in Christianity? For example, revise the story about who killed Jesus and… I don’t know… make it accurate? Btw did you know that Rabbi Abraham Joshua Heschel actually did something pretty similar? Representing the American Jewish Committee, he played a key role in shaping Nostra Aetate during Vatican II by meeting in the 1960’s Cardinal Augustin Bea and Pope Paul VI, not once, not twice but multiple times submitting memoranda condemning antisemitism and rejecting the deicide charge. He fiercely opposed drafts suggesting any hope for Jewish conversion—calling it “spiritual fratricide”. And either through determination or they just got irritated with him, successfully convinced the Pope and the cardinals to remove these types of paragraphs, ensuring the final document avoided proselytizing language and affirmed the enduring covenant with Israel.
Ok, ok, back to the Torah: the first law dictated by Yitro regards… bribes! Right of the bat. Yup. The Torah, and the human civilization, may be older than we think. Why? The Torah contains wisdom we now know predates the horizon of written history.
The outcome of Yitro’s suggestion was establishing court systems among Israelites—while they were still nomads! This is extremely important and goes hand in hand with revealing the Torah on Sinai. Why? Because by the time they heard all the Torah laws on Sinai they already had in place a system for their practical application, and a sense of how important laws are for society to function well. And this was all before conquering the Promised Land! So, at the brink of our history this outsider had a profound impact on our growth. So, the lesson here is: always listen to your father in law!
Every Shabbat is a Divine built-in antidote to the Moshe’s mindset. When we step away from the endless to-do list, unplug, and rest, something miraculous happens: our perspective on everything that is mundane slowly changes. After 25 hours of real rest, you look at that overflowing task list on Saturday night and think, “Wait… why on earth did I think it was a good idea to have a garage sale at 8am on Sunday morning?”… Shabbat clears the mental clutter. Shabbat exposes what’s truly essential. Shabbat makes us more open, more creative, more willing to delegate and say “Hey, maybe my wife could do the garage sale on Sunday morning?” Ok, all joking aside: It reminds us we don’t have to be the hero of every story; we get to be part of a holy team and that’s really something!
So tonight, as we welcome Shabbat, let’s think about sharing our tasks – including those we perform on Shabbat. Let’s trust each other’s skills, let’s trust each other’s judgment, and let God handle what’s impossible for us. And who knows? Maybe after Havdalah, after we sing Eliyahu Hanavi, instead of Eliyahu showing up, maybe Yitro will show up and give us a PowerPoint presentation: “Ten More Tips from The Ancient Midnianite Priest – Your Father-in-Law!”
Shabbat shalom!
Rabbi Mirski
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