Menachem Mirski
Thoughts on Parashat Kedoshim 5784
Kedoshim tihiyu – You shall be holy (Leviticus 19:2) – that’s how our this week’s parashah, Kedoshim, begins. The opening verses are immediately followed by a set of laws that define what does it mean to be ‘holy’ in our tradition: it means honoring parents, observing shabbat, not getting involved in idolatry, not turning to ghosts or inquiring of spirits, all kinds of things our ancestors learned in Egyptian slavery as well as some pretty specific law like:
When you enter the land and plant any tree for food, you shall regard its fruit as forbidden. Three years it shall be forbidden for you, not to be eaten. (Leviticus 19:23)
Our Torah portion also contains very general, moral laws/principles to be followed all the time and in every situation that involves other human beings. These are those laws:
You shall not hate your kinsfolk in your heart. Reprove your kin but incur no guilt on their account.
You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against members of your people. Love your fellow [Israelite] as yourself: I am יהוה. Leviticus 19:17-18
And they should be internalized, or to use the language of Ibn Ezra – implanted in the heart. And since these laws are of fundamental importance for the functioning of human society, let’s reflect more deeply about their meaning. Here is what the great medieval commentator, Rashi, tells us about of the laws included in verse 17:
[THOU SHALT IN ANY WISE REBUKE THY COMPANION] AND NOT BEAR A SIN ON ACCOUNT OF HIM — i. e. though rebuking him thou shalt not expose him to shame (lit., make his face grow pale) in public, in which case you will bear sin on account of him (cf. Sifra, Kedoshim, Chapter 4 8; Arakhin 16b).
There are two important nuances here. One is about the balance between (may-be justified) criticism and (never justified) hatred. The law not only permits but encourages criticism of those who commit wrongdoings but at the same time sets the limits of criticism, preventing its escalation into hatred. Another nuance is about rebuke/criticism itself – it shall never be done by embarrassing, shaming or humiliating someone publicly. Anyone who gets involved in a behavior like that has a sin. What does it mean that someone “has a sin”? It means that this person is liable. It means that this person needs to reflect upon their own behavior, repent and compensate for the harm. And here is where the thing gets really problematic: how can we compensate for shaming or humiliating someone publicly? The only thing that comes to my mind is a public apology, making amends. This, however, is never going to restore the previous status quo – once you shamed someone publicly, you can never take it back – it’s going to remain in the public consciousness forever.
Another interesting point stemming from this analysis is the following: exposing someone else’s sin publicly makes you sin yourself. Talking publicly about the sins of others spreads the sin. In this way sin becomes contagious. If situations like that become a norm it deteriorates the culture and (moral) quality of life of the whole community. This can be reversed only by acts of loving kindness. Thus, what we learn from this reflection is that these two verses – Lev 19:17-18 (containing actually 5 of 613 laws) talk about two opposite directions our life, depending on the fulfillment of these commandments, may evolve into. If we observe these commandments mindfully it will improve our relationships with others. If we do not take them seriously and obey them, our communal life will drift toward unbearable and toxic reality that nobody will like to partake in. Therefore, I consider adherence to these laws fundamentally important, especially in these socially unstable and turbulent times we live in now.
Shabbat shalom,
Rabbi Mirski
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